When it comes to dealing with wedding vendors, assumptions can lead to disappointments. It’s better to seek clarity in any place where not knowing makes you feel anxious.

If your florist was v ague about bringing pillars to the ceremony, don’t assume they will because you saw them in the shop. Find out! If your cake maker didn’t specify whether the cake would be peanut allergen free, don’t assume it is, just because you can’t think of any reason to use peanuts in a cake. If your DJ didn’t ask you about what kind of music you like, don’t assume you’re going to like what he plays, and If he didn’t tell you he’d take requests, don’t assume he will. These could be important questions to you.



Professionals Like Clarity

If there is something I have not effectively communicated to my clients, I greatly appreciate their effort to better understand me. Some clients feel anxious seeking clarification, as they though should already know how to work with a photographer, or plan a wedding. Or perhaps thinking that they are difficult to work with. This is not the case and people do make communication errors sometimes. If you feel unsure of something, bringing it to light and seeking clarification can increase the sense of confidence in all involved parties, which can lead to better collaboration and better results.



For your sanity, keep it in balance.

There’s a difference between seeking clarity over whether your caterer will be bringing heating trays with them, and whether your caterer will be bringing food at all. It’s insulting to question if someone you have already thoroughly vetted is going to do the very basics of their job. Like, the caterer showing up with food, or the photographer bringing his camera. It’s called micromanaging and you should have all of these kinds of things thoroughly clarified before you ever sign a contract.

Seeking clarification on things like the inclusion of digital files in a wedding photographer’s package, whether the roses in the Bride’s bouquet are red or bright pink, or whether the crab cakes have dairy in them, can both help catch little mistakes from lack of clarity, and help ease you own sense of nervousness throughout the whole wedding planning and celebrating process.

It’s also important to note that although all good wedding vendors make an effort to get to know you and gain an understanding of what’s important to you, ultimately, our degree of clarity is provided by you. How willing are you to open up and reveal what you want?



How to seek clarity.

I advise you do the majority of your communications with wedding vendors over email. The reason is that it creates a clear communication trail as decisions are made and discussed. This can help improve clarity simply by being able to review the conversation. But, will also help you see things that are not so clear to you, and might be important.

When you have already been dealing with your wedding vendors over email, seeking clarity can be as simple as a quick email saying “I just realized we haven’t discussed dinnerware… will I need to make my own accommodations for that?” or, “Hey, William, I just realized, we’re going to be shooting formals during the cocktail hour. Will someone be able to get pictures of that while we’re gone?” My answer to this particular question, of course, would be yes.

The point is, when you have hired professionals, seeking clarity can sometimes feel like stepping on toes. Rest assured, when there is something unclear and it is making you anxious, your wedding vendor wants to give you clarity.